my trip to the optometrist
i went for my yearly optometry appointment 2 days ago. i'm usually not that good about going, but in this case, i broke my glasses... so i actually really needed to go. my boyfriend also made a comment that he thought i looked cute with glasses, so of course, i was thinking.... "sexy librarian?" (bing! light bulb)
anyhoo, this place i go to is practically an optometry factory. they have about 10 - 15 optometrists on site and see hundreds of people a day. they're even open until 8 pm. i get assigned a fairly young asian female doctor, who is SO nice and almost timid... but doesn't seem that bright. i'm a bit nervous, but after glancing at the wall - i see that she's got all kinds of degrees... that's got to mean something, right?
i have to take out my contacts, and all of a sudden, my whole world is a blur, literally. (my boyfriend once had a good laugh at my expense when he saw me trying to text message without my contacts or glasses... i had the cell phone almost touching my nose) well, she proceeds to give me an eye exam. oddly, she tests and checks for things that no one has ever checked for. is she being too thorough? or where my past visits not thorough enough?hmmmm....
imagine my horror, when she brings in the sample lens that basically layers all the lenses together to give them the formula for what i need. they were so heavy that i had to hold them with both hands. i put them on, and i see DOUBLE! i was like - WTF? she figures out that both eyes are not at the same level and that is causing the double vision (*huge sigh*). so after 10 minutes of trying different combinations of lenses, we get something that is workable.
then we move onto the dialation discussion. she says that she noticed that i checked the box saying that i didn't want dialation. i think, "am i losing my mind? i read the section twice and was positive that i checked the YES box" - she walks to a poster across the room, and starts to explain how our retina's can be stretched and cause damage. i am in shock. does she have no clue that i can't see anything that she is pointing out? HELLO!?!?! didn't she just figure out my prescription and realize that i'm half blind? so, i tell her. and embarrassed, she proceeds to explain it in more description sans the poster.
anyway, she tells me that the only way to really accurately read the condition of my retina would be to dialate. do i want it? i'm thinking.... "no, i'd really much rather NOT do it, so the reading will be inaccurate." i am feeling really nervous now.
she also asks me if i would be driving home. i was thinking, uh - "does she think i walked?" (okay, to be fair, i could have had a friend with me) i answered "yes" that i was driving. she thought about it for what felt like forever... and said, "i guess that's okay." now my heart is beating faster.... is my car insurance updated?
she puts the drops in my eyes and tells me to have a seat in the waiting area. again, she seems to have totally forgotten that i can't see. i somehow find a row of chairs and sit down. i'm immediately dying of boredom. i need constant stimulation... so i'm dying. i look toward the plasma screen TV, of course... i can't see a thing. i guess i could just listen to "war of the worlds? it worked for orsen wells.
i can't read a magazine. i can't text. it would be rude to talk on the phone in the waiting area. do i just sit here and stare into nothing? i opt to be rude and talk on the phone. of course, i have to hold the phone up to my nose to find my phonelist...
anyway, after what seemed like an hour (actually it was 10 minutes), i ask her if it's okay to put on my contacts now. she says that since i have color contacts, she won't be able to see. i tell her, "i don't have color contacts" to which she replies.. "are you sure?" i was flabberghasted. "uh, yah, i'm sure." SHE ACTUALLY GOES TO CHECK. and then discovers that i am correct. imagine that?
the rest was pretty painless. except that i was there so long that the eyeglass dept closed and i have to go back AGAIN.
so that's my story....
The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. ~Voltaire (François Marie Arouet)
anyhoo, this place i go to is practically an optometry factory. they have about 10 - 15 optometrists on site and see hundreds of people a day. they're even open until 8 pm. i get assigned a fairly young asian female doctor, who is SO nice and almost timid... but doesn't seem that bright. i'm a bit nervous, but after glancing at the wall - i see that she's got all kinds of degrees... that's got to mean something, right?
i have to take out my contacts, and all of a sudden, my whole world is a blur, literally. (my boyfriend once had a good laugh at my expense when he saw me trying to text message without my contacts or glasses... i had the cell phone almost touching my nose) well, she proceeds to give me an eye exam. oddly, she tests and checks for things that no one has ever checked for. is she being too thorough? or where my past visits not thorough enough?hmmmm....
imagine my horror, when she brings in the sample lens that basically layers all the lenses together to give them the formula for what i need. they were so heavy that i had to hold them with both hands. i put them on, and i see DOUBLE! i was like - WTF? she figures out that both eyes are not at the same level and that is causing the double vision (*huge sigh*). so after 10 minutes of trying different combinations of lenses, we get something that is workable.
then we move onto the dialation discussion. she says that she noticed that i checked the box saying that i didn't want dialation. i think, "am i losing my mind? i read the section twice and was positive that i checked the YES box" - she walks to a poster across the room, and starts to explain how our retina's can be stretched and cause damage. i am in shock. does she have no clue that i can't see anything that she is pointing out? HELLO!?!?! didn't she just figure out my prescription and realize that i'm half blind? so, i tell her. and embarrassed, she proceeds to explain it in more description sans the poster.
anyway, she tells me that the only way to really accurately read the condition of my retina would be to dialate. do i want it? i'm thinking.... "no, i'd really much rather NOT do it, so the reading will be inaccurate." i am feeling really nervous now.
she also asks me if i would be driving home. i was thinking, uh - "does she think i walked?" (okay, to be fair, i could have had a friend with me) i answered "yes" that i was driving. she thought about it for what felt like forever... and said, "i guess that's okay." now my heart is beating faster.... is my car insurance updated?
she puts the drops in my eyes and tells me to have a seat in the waiting area. again, she seems to have totally forgotten that i can't see. i somehow find a row of chairs and sit down. i'm immediately dying of boredom. i need constant stimulation... so i'm dying. i look toward the plasma screen TV, of course... i can't see a thing. i guess i could just listen to "war of the worlds? it worked for orsen wells.
i can't read a magazine. i can't text. it would be rude to talk on the phone in the waiting area. do i just sit here and stare into nothing? i opt to be rude and talk on the phone. of course, i have to hold the phone up to my nose to find my phonelist...
anyway, after what seemed like an hour (actually it was 10 minutes), i ask her if it's okay to put on my contacts now. she says that since i have color contacts, she won't be able to see. i tell her, "i don't have color contacts" to which she replies.. "are you sure?" i was flabberghasted. "uh, yah, i'm sure." SHE ACTUALLY GOES TO CHECK. and then discovers that i am correct. imagine that?
the rest was pretty painless. except that i was there so long that the eyeglass dept closed and i have to go back AGAIN.
so that's my story....
The art of medicine consists in amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. ~Voltaire (François Marie Arouet)
posted by serena @ 10:45 AM
1 Comments:
At 9:53 PM,
Anonymous said…
As an optometrist that has been out of school for quite a long time I found your post very humorous, and unfortunately pretty much the way it is in the field nowadays.The problem with most of the chains out there is that they all like to hire the young asian female OD (thats what they are called) because they work cheap, and are easily to tell what to do.
Unfortunately it keeps our wages low, and many of us older experienced docs out of jobs. They dont care about the experience of the doc, just how cheap they can get them. And yes, the new grads are not as confident in themselves so they feel they have to do every test known to mankind (or womenkind to be totally pc0. My advise would be to talk to as many people as you can and try to get a reference for a private optometrist, as you will probably experience the same thing all over again. Hope my rant helps!
Docante
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